The AI agent parenting arc

Young parents often cannot stop talking about their baby and what a wonderful thing they created. How unique and different it is from all the other babies you have seen. You listen politely and nod.
Very few young parents tell you about the pain, the lack of sleep and the inherit costs and responsibilities a child carries with them.
Month 0: Birth
Look at this gorgeous newborn. I prompt engineered it into existence. It currently speaks fluent 404 and confidently hallucinates. The LLM bill ain't cheap, but it will be worth it.
Month 1: Crawling
The toddler doesn't sleep. It sends me a market report by 6:30 AM and hunts down news around the globe. It is obsessed with viral threads, and optimisation but needs a tutor to wrap his head around certain things that I need to pay for.
Month 10: Running
Now my agent books my meetings, ranks my emails by urgency level, and buys me ergonomic chairs I didn’t ask for. Feels like peak productivity but that comes with private school tuition fees.
The Scaling Wall: Puberty
We keep shoveling more context, more fine tuning data, and more RAG documents into this thing hoping it’ll finally get smart. Instead we are seeing diminishing returns. High quality data is basically unobtanium now.
Year 2: Flying
I expect my autonomous income generating agent to run my entire life while I sip Espresso Martinis on the beach by 2028.
The Big Questions:
Is my prodigy ever going to pay rent? Or are we just cosplaying as proud parents of a basement dwelling genius who eats $8k / month?